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I am getting regular emails from my friends on interesting stories, fun, humor, etc. I am planning to share some of them here. Read and enjoy the mails. Don't forget to provide your feedback.
This is my first lens about Funny Emails. Checkout my latest lenses
Part II - Funny Emails and Funny Stories
Part III - Inspiring Short Stories
Part IV - Funny and Interesting Quotes
This is my first lens about Funny Emails. Checkout my latest lenses
Part II - Funny Emails and Funny Stories
Part III - Inspiring Short Stories
Part IV - Funny and Interesting Quotes
Funny Toys for Your Kids
Think out of box
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Wife Defined by some wonderful persons
Posted on : 09 Jul 09DavidBissonette
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
Sacha Guitry
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
Socrates
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Anonymous
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Dumas
The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, 'What does a woman want?
Sigmund Freud
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Anonymous
'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.'
Sam Kinison
'There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.'
James Holt McGavran
'I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't.'
Patrick Murray
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Nash
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once....
Anonymous
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Henny Youngman
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Anonymous
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
Anonymous
First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
Sacha Guitry
After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
Socrates
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
Anonymous
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
Dumas
The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, 'What does a woman want?
Sigmund Freud
I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
Anonymous
'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.'
Sam Kinison
'There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.'
James Holt McGavran
'I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't.'
Patrick Murray
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
Nash
The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once....
Anonymous
You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
Henny Youngman
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
Anonymous
A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
Anonymous
First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
Thanks to : Thirumurugan
No one can see your passwords or whatever you're typing
Grandma in Court
Lawyers should never ask grandmas a question if they aren't prepared for the answer .
Posted on 11 Feb 2009
In a trial, a small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, an elderly grandmother to the stand.
He approached her and asked; " Mrs.. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you're a big disappointment to me.
You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher.
Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, " Mrs.. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster. He's lazy, bigoted, and has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women.
One of them was your wife. Yes I know him."
The defense attorney almost died.
The judge asked both lawyers to approach the bench and in a quiet voice said: "If either of you rascals asks her if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair ."
He approached her and asked; " Mrs.. Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you're a big disappointment to me.
You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher.
Yes, I know you."
The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, " Mrs.. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster. He's lazy, bigoted, and has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women.
One of them was your wife. Yes I know him."
The defense attorney almost died.
The judge asked both lawyers to approach the bench and in a quiet voice said: "If either of you rascals asks her if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair ."
Funny Cat
Some of the things you can buy
See it carefully
Honorable MEN
Must Read for Every Man and of course Woman (to understand man)
Posted on 17 Feb 2009
If a female is reading this article then just realize the value of a man; and if its a male then feel proud of after reading it!
"One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river, his axe fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you crying?"
The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water, and he needed the axe to make his living.
The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord again went down and came up with a silver Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord went down again and came up with an iron Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.
Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the riverbank, and his wife fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"
"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"
The Lord went down into the water and came up with ANGELINA JOLIE "Is this your wife?" the Lord asked.
"Yes," cried the woodcutter.
The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"
The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to ANGELINA JOLIE , You would have come up with CAMERON DIAZ . Then if I said 'no' to her, you would have come up with my wife . Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care
of all three wives, so THAT'S why I said yes to ANGELINA JOLIE ."
The moral of this story is: Whenever a man lies, it is for a good and honorable reason, and for the benefit of others.
That's the story, and they are sticking to it! - "WE ARE HONORABLE MEN!!!!!!"
"One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river, his axe fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you crying?"
The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water, and he needed the axe to make his living.
The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord again went down and came up with a silver Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."
The Lord went down again and came up with an iron Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked.
The woodcutter replied, "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.
Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the riverbank, and his wife fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"
"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"
The Lord went down into the water and came up with ANGELINA JOLIE "Is this your wife?" the Lord asked.
"Yes," cried the woodcutter.
The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"
The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to ANGELINA JOLIE , You would have come up with CAMERON DIAZ . Then if I said 'no' to her, you would have come up with my wife . Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I am a poor man, and am not able to take care
of all three wives, so THAT'S why I said yes to ANGELINA JOLIE ."
The moral of this story is: Whenever a man lies, it is for a good and honorable reason, and for the benefit of others.
That's the story, and they are sticking to it! - "WE ARE HONORABLE MEN!!!!!!"
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Thoughts of a SATYAM Employee...
JUST ANOTHER DIMENSION TO LOOK AT WORK... MAKES A HUGE IMPACT. JUST READ ON...
Posted on 26 Feb 2009
Dear All,
I (Satyam Employee) am deputed at client location and came across a very interesting conversation in cafeteria yesterday. One of my co-worker, also deputed with the same client through some lesser known two room company, mustered guts to ask me sarcastically in front of entire team, "So, Satyam is gone! What are you guys planning to do now?" In normal circumstances, I have a habit to not to reply to lose talks, but in front of entire team.... I thought I need to fix this guy's thought process. I asked him, as my military training has imbibed in me the habit to fight till last breadth, "Who says Satyam is gone when I am very much alive here and committed to create value on behalf of my company?". He shot back, "Hello Mr., your chairman has resigned, you guys are facing financial turbulence and you still have a face to say that Satyam is not gone!"
At this juncture, I thought of replying to this guy in his own language.. I asked him, "Tell me, what will you do and where will you go if our country India was not there?", He was not prepared for this level of thought and asked back, "What a stupid question, How can India be gone, it is a country?" I asked him back, "Country! What makes a country? Land? Economy? Our Prime Minister? Our President? Our Geography? Or the PEOPLE? If our PM resigns, will you say India is gone? If our economy faces a slowdown, will you say India is gone? But yes, if the people of a country are lost for any reason, we will say that country has no meaning. Who cares of vast land of Antarctica today which has just one permanent resident, Father Georgy? Which country does it belongs to? Why does not it has any government? Why does not it has any economy? Or, how many countries were there when humans used to hunt for food in pre-historic times? Countries, Wealth, Infrastructures and booming economies are nothing but creations of efforts of PEOPLE, and they do not have any existance on their own. And the final blow was, "When one man can create Satyam as an organization of 53,000 people, why not 53,000 committed people can rebuild one SATYAM?"
TRULY INSPIRING......
I (Satyam Employee) am deputed at client location and came across a very interesting conversation in cafeteria yesterday. One of my co-worker, also deputed with the same client through some lesser known two room company, mustered guts to ask me sarcastically in front of entire team, "So, Satyam is gone! What are you guys planning to do now?" In normal circumstances, I have a habit to not to reply to lose talks, but in front of entire team.... I thought I need to fix this guy's thought process. I asked him, as my military training has imbibed in me the habit to fight till last breadth, "Who says Satyam is gone when I am very much alive here and committed to create value on behalf of my company?". He shot back, "Hello Mr., your chairman has resigned, you guys are facing financial turbulence and you still have a face to say that Satyam is not gone!"
At this juncture, I thought of replying to this guy in his own language.. I asked him, "Tell me, what will you do and where will you go if our country India was not there?", He was not prepared for this level of thought and asked back, "What a stupid question, How can India be gone, it is a country?" I asked him back, "Country! What makes a country? Land? Economy? Our Prime Minister? Our President? Our Geography? Or the PEOPLE? If our PM resigns, will you say India is gone? If our economy faces a slowdown, will you say India is gone? But yes, if the people of a country are lost for any reason, we will say that country has no meaning. Who cares of vast land of Antarctica today which has just one permanent resident, Father Georgy? Which country does it belongs to? Why does not it has any government? Why does not it has any economy? Or, how many countries were there when humans used to hunt for food in pre-historic times? Countries, Wealth, Infrastructures and booming economies are nothing but creations of efforts of PEOPLE, and they do not have any existance on their own. And the final blow was, "When one man can create Satyam as an organization of 53,000 people, why not 53,000 committed people can rebuild one SATYAM?"
TRULY INSPIRING......
Side Effects Of Alcohol - A Warning Message
Posted on 29 Jan 2009
1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.
Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring theDrink on your feet).
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward
2. Symptom : The wall facing you is full of lights.
Cause: You're lying on the floor.
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.
3. Symptom: The floor looks blurry.
Cause: You're looking through an empty glass.
Cure: Quickly refill with your favorite drink!
4. Symptom : The floor is moving.
Cause: You're being dragged away.
Cure: At least ask where they're taking you!
5. Symptom : You hear echoes every time someone speaks.
Cause: You have your glass on your ear.
Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself!
6. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking funny.
Cause: You're in the wrong house.
Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.
7. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and The music is very repetitive.
Cause : You're in an ambulance.
Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job.
Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring theDrink on your feet).
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward
2. Symptom : The wall facing you is full of lights.
Cause: You're lying on the floor.
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.
3. Symptom: The floor looks blurry.
Cause: You're looking through an empty glass.
Cure: Quickly refill with your favorite drink!
4. Symptom : The floor is moving.
Cause: You're being dragged away.
Cure: At least ask where they're taking you!
5. Symptom : You hear echoes every time someone speaks.
Cause: You have your glass on your ear.
Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself!
6. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking funny.
Cause: You're in the wrong house.
Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.
7. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and The music is very repetitive.
Cause : You're in an ambulance.
Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job.
Sweet memories
Remember those days?..........
When Teacher was not there in class.....what and all we use to do !!!!!.
On Your Birthday party !!
U Understand this (Need not to tell)
Getting Fun by doing some mistakes....
One time bath in a week. Because of very Busy study schedules !!
The "Cups" which we have stolen ???
Many Adventures!!
Many Occasions. Which made our Friendship bond Very strong!!??
Week end Parties!!.....
When Teacher was not there in class.....what and all we use to do !!!!!.
On Your Birthday party !!
U Understand this (Need not to tell)
Getting Fun by doing some mistakes....
One time bath in a week. Because of very Busy study schedules !!
The "Cups" which we have stolen ???
Many Adventures!!
Many Occasions. Which made our Friendship bond Very strong!!??
Week end Parties!!.....
A satisfied Employee and Employer!!
Posted on : 22 Jan 2009
A little boy went into a drug store, reached for a soda carton and
pulled it over to the telephone. He climbed onto the carton so that he
could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in seven
digits. The store-owner observed and listened to the conversation: The
boy asked, "Lady, Can you give me the job of cutting your lawn?" The
woman replied, "I already have someone to cut my lawn." Lady, I will
cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn
now." replied boy.
The woman responded that she was very satisfied with the person who
was presently cutting her lawn. The little boy found more perseverance
and offered, "Lady, I'll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on
Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all of North Palm Beach,
Florida." Again the woman answered in the negative. With a smile on
his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.
The store-owner, who was listening to all this, walked over to the boy
and said, "Son... I like your attitude; I like that positive spirit
and would like to offer you a job." The little boy replied, "No
thanks, I was just checking my performance and the job I already have.
I am the one who is working for that lady, I was talking to !"
pulled it over to the telephone. He climbed onto the carton so that he
could reach the buttons on the phone and proceeded to punch in seven
digits. The store-owner observed and listened to the conversation: The
boy asked, "Lady, Can you give me the job of cutting your lawn?" The
woman replied, "I already have someone to cut my lawn." Lady, I will
cut your lawn for half the price of the person who cuts your lawn
now." replied boy.
The woman responded that she was very satisfied with the person who
was presently cutting her lawn. The little boy found more perseverance
and offered, "Lady, I'll even sweep your curb and your sidewalk, so on
Sunday you will have the prettiest lawn in all of North Palm Beach,
Florida." Again the woman answered in the negative. With a smile on
his face, the little boy replaced the receiver.
The store-owner, who was listening to all this, walked over to the boy
and said, "Son... I like your attitude; I like that positive spirit
and would like to offer you a job." The little boy replied, "No
thanks, I was just checking my performance and the job I already have.
I am the one who is working for that lady, I was talking to !"
Believe it or not you can read it
Posted on : 22 Jan 2009
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer inwaht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt.
One Minute Please !
Do you like these funny E-mails ?
Funny Cat
Signs That You're A Drunk
Posted on : 19 Jan 2009
1. You lose arguments with inanimate objects.
2. You have to hold on to the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
3. Your job starts to interfere with your drinking.
4. Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
5. The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
6. You sincerely believe alcohol is the elusive 5th food group.
7. 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case Coincidence?!?!?
8. Two hands and just one mouth now THAT'S a drinking problem.
9. Every woman you see has an exact twin.
10. You fall off the floor
11. Hey, 5 beers have just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!
12. Your idea of cutting back is less salt.
13. Every night you're beginning to find your neighbors cat more and more attractive
14. I'm not drunk you're just sober!!
15. Roseanne looks good
16. You don't recognize your wife unless seen from the bottom of a glass.
17. That damned pink elephant followed me home again.
18. You have a reserved parking space at the liquor store.
19. You've fallen and can't get up.
20. The shrubbery's drunk too, from frequent watering.
2. You have to hold on to the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.
3. Your job starts to interfere with your drinking.
4. Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.
5. The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat.
6. You sincerely believe alcohol is the elusive 5th food group.
7. 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case Coincidence?!?!?
8. Two hands and just one mouth now THAT'S a drinking problem.
9. Every woman you see has an exact twin.
10. You fall off the floor
11. Hey, 5 beers have just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner!
12. Your idea of cutting back is less salt.
13. Every night you're beginning to find your neighbors cat more and more attractive
14. I'm not drunk you're just sober!!
15. Roseanne looks good
16. You don't recognize your wife unless seen from the bottom of a glass.
17. That damned pink elephant followed me home again.
18. You have a reserved parking space at the liquor store.
19. You've fallen and can't get up.
20. The shrubbery's drunk too, from frequent watering.
Funny English
Posted on : 17 Jan 2009
These are some dialogs said by teachers and professors who are not so good at ENGLISH.
our class teacher once said :
" pick up the paper and fall in the dustbin!!!"
**************************************************************************************
once our hindi teacher said...."i'm going out of the world to america.."....lol...
**************************************************************************************
"..DON'T TRY TO TALK IN FRONT OF MY BACK.."
**************************************************************************************
dont..laugh at the back benches...otherwise teeth and all will be fallen down.....
**************************************************************************************
it was very hot in the afternoon when the teacher entered.. tried to switch the fan on but there was sum problem. and then she said
" why is fan not oning" (ing form of on)
**************************************************************************************
teacher in a furious mood...
write down ur name and father of ur name!!
**************************************************************************************
"shhh... quiet... the principal is revolving around college"
**************************************************************************************
"half of u go to the right, half of u go to the left n the remaining come behind me"......
**************************************************************************************
My manager started like this
"Hi, I am Madhu, Married with two kids"
**************************************************************************************
"I'll illustrate what i have in my mind" said the professor and erased the board
**************************************************************************************
"will u hang that calender or else i'll HANG MYSELF"
**************************************************************************************
LIBRARIAN SCOLDE ," IF U WILL TALK AGAIN , I WILL KNEEL DOWN OUTSIDE"
**************************************************************************************
our chemistry HOD comes and tells us...
"My aim is to study my son and marry my daughter"
**************************************************************************************
tomorrow call ur parents especially mother and father
**************************************************************************************
"why are you looking at the monkeys outside when i am in the class?!"
**************************************************************************************
our lab assistant said this when my frnd wrote wrong code..
"i understand. u understand.computer how understand??
**************************************************************************************
our class teacher once said :
" pick up the paper and fall in the dustbin!!!"
**************************************************************************************
once our hindi teacher said...."i'm going out of the world to america.."....lol...
**************************************************************************************
"..DON'T TRY TO TALK IN FRONT OF MY BACK.."
**************************************************************************************
dont..laugh at the back benches...otherwise teeth and all will be fallen down.....
**************************************************************************************
it was very hot in the afternoon when the teacher entered.. tried to switch the fan on but there was sum problem. and then she said
" why is fan not oning" (ing form of on)
**************************************************************************************
teacher in a furious mood...
write down ur name and father of ur name!!
**************************************************************************************
"shhh... quiet... the principal is revolving around college"
**************************************************************************************
"half of u go to the right, half of u go to the left n the remaining come behind me"......
**************************************************************************************
My manager started like this
"Hi, I am Madhu, Married with two kids"
**************************************************************************************
"I'll illustrate what i have in my mind" said the professor and erased the board
**************************************************************************************
"will u hang that calender or else i'll HANG MYSELF"
**************************************************************************************
LIBRARIAN SCOLDE ," IF U WILL TALK AGAIN , I WILL KNEEL DOWN OUTSIDE"
**************************************************************************************
our chemistry HOD comes and tells us...
"My aim is to study my son and marry my daughter"
**************************************************************************************
tomorrow call ur parents especially mother and father
**************************************************************************************
"why are you looking at the monkeys outside when i am in the class?!"
**************************************************************************************
our lab assistant said this when my frnd wrote wrong code..
"i understand. u understand.computer how understand??
**************************************************************************************
Think Positive
Posted on : 16 Jan 2009
If you think your job is tough, how about him?
If you think your salary is low, how about her?
If you think you don't have many friends,
ask yourself if you have one sincere friend?
If you think study is a burden, how about her?
When you feel like giving up, think of this man.
If you think you suffer in life, do you suffer as much as he does?
If you complaint about your transport system, how about them?
If your society is unfair to you, how about her?
Always be positive
If you think your job is tough, how about him?
If you think your salary is low, how about her?
If you think you don't have many friends,
ask yourself if you have one sincere friend?
If you think study is a burden, how about her?
When you feel like giving up, think of this man.
If you think you suffer in life, do you suffer as much as he does?
If you complaint about your transport system, how about them?
If your society is unfair to you, how about her?
Always be positive
Just to Laugh, Not more than that
Love Letter By An Executive!
Posted on : 15 Jan 2009
Dearest Ms Juliet,
I am very happy to inform you that I have fallen in Love with you since the 14th of October (Sunday). With reference to the meeting held between us on the 27th of July. at 1500 hrs,
I would like to present myself as a prospective lover.
Our love affair would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on compatibility, would be made permanent. Of course, upon completion of probation,
there will be continuous on the job training and performance appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse.
The expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us. Later, based on your performance, I might take up a larger share of the expenses.
However I am broadminded enough to be taken care of, on your expense account.
I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving this letter, failing which, this offer would be cancelled without further notice and I shall be considering someone else. I would be happy,
Thanking you in anticipation,
Yours sincerely,
Romeo ( HR Executive )
I am very happy to inform you that I have fallen in Love with you since the 14th of October (Sunday). With reference to the meeting held between us on the 27th of July. at 1500 hrs,
I would like to present myself as a prospective lover.
Our love affair would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on compatibility, would be made permanent. Of course, upon completion of probation,
there will be continuous on the job training and performance appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse.
The expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us. Later, based on your performance, I might take up a larger share of the expenses.
However I am broadminded enough to be taken care of, on your expense account.
I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving this letter, failing which, this offer would be cancelled without further notice and I shall be considering someone else. I would be happy,
Thanking you in anticipation,
Yours sincerely,
Romeo ( HR Executive )
Good night Kiss!
Posted on : 12 Jan 2009
One night a guy took his girlfriend home.
As they were about to kiss each other goodnight at the front door,the guy started feeling a little in the mood. With an air of confidence, he leaned with his hand against the wall and smiling, he said to her "Honey, would you give me a kiss?"
Horrified, she replied, "Are you mad? My parents will see us!"
"Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?" He asked grinning at her.
"No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?"
"Oh come on! There's nobody around, they're all sleeping!".
"No way. It's just too risky!" "Oh please, please, I love you so much?!?".
"No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can't!" .
"Oh yes you can. Please?"
"No, no. I just can't"
"I'm begging you ... "
Out of the blue, the light on the stairs went on, and the girl's older sister showed up in her pajamas, hair disheveled, and in a sleepy voice she said, "Dad says to go ahead and give him a kiss, or I can do it.
Or if need be, mom says she can come down herself and do it, but for God's sake and all of ours....
TELL HIM TO TAKE HIS HAND
OFF THE CALLING BELL ! !
As they were about to kiss each other goodnight at the front door,the guy started feeling a little in the mood. With an air of confidence, he leaned with his hand against the wall and smiling, he said to her "Honey, would you give me a kiss?"
Horrified, she replied, "Are you mad? My parents will see us!"
"Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?" He asked grinning at her.
"No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?"
"Oh come on! There's nobody around, they're all sleeping!".
"No way. It's just too risky!" "Oh please, please, I love you so much?!?".
"No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can't!" .
"Oh yes you can. Please?"
"No, no. I just can't"
"I'm begging you ... "
Out of the blue, the light on the stairs went on, and the girl's older sister showed up in her pajamas, hair disheveled, and in a sleepy voice she said, "Dad says to go ahead and give him a kiss, or I can do it.
Or if need be, mom says she can come down herself and do it, but for God's sake and all of ours....
TELL HIM TO TAKE HIS HAND
OFF THE CALLING BELL ! !
Magic with Letters
Posted on : 10 Jan 2009
DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM
PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER
ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER
DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT
THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE
GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE
THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS
SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME
ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY
ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT
SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S
A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE
THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE
ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE
AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:
MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM
PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER
ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER
DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT
THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE
GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE
THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS
SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME
ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY
ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT
SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S
A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE
THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE
ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE
AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:
MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER
Fun Tips
Posted on : 08 Jan 20091. A FOOLish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are CLOSED.
2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption :
Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD
After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY
3. Three FASTEST means of Communication :
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.
4. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC
5. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time ?
It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.
6. Let us be generous like this : Four Ants are moving through a forest.
They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says : we should KILL him.
Ant 2 says : No, Let us break his Leg alone. Ant 3 says : No, we will
just throw him away from our path. Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE him
because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.
7. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life. If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.
8. Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer : On their MARRIAGE.
9. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness. Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.
10. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women. Because per Constitution, you can NOT PUNISH TWICE for the same Mistake.
2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption :
Before Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD
After Marriage - Drink whenever you are HAPPY
3. Three FASTEST means of Communication :
1. Tele-Phone
2. Tele-Vision
3. Tell to Woman
Need still FASTER - Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.
4. A man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and Best Woman.
Next moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
Moral : BE SPECIFIC
5. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time ?
It is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.
6. Let us be generous like this : Four Ants are moving through a forest.
They see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says : we should KILL him.
Ant 2 says : No, Let us break his Leg alone. Ant 3 says : No, we will
just throw him away from our path. Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE him
because he is ALONE and we are FOUR.
7. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend - You are missing SOME thing in your life. If you HAVE a Girl Friend - You are missing EVERY thing in your life.
8. Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer : On their MARRIAGE.
9. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from Darkness. Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness - Please PAY the ELECTRICITY BILL.
10. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women. Because per Constitution, you can NOT PUNISH TWICE for the same Mistake.
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